I think it depends on the age if the kids. For the young ones, sure let them get trophies for participating. As they age they will learn that they don't always win. It's an important lesson to learn.

I am in strong support of organized sports for kids. I feel it offers them many lessons in teamwork, self-esteem, discipline, and most importantly, fun-in addition to the health benefits. Although my daughter is only 5 and just starting the organized sports experience, I do have concerns with how certain things are handled with the sports. I think it is important for kids to be recognized for their participation (and especially their dedication) in a sport. I do, however, question why everyone has to get a medal or trophy for simply participating, and at what age does that end? At young ages, when kids are just learning the fundamentals of a sport, I don't think it's all that important to keep score. But, as they get older and know what it is like to win or loss, it's important to recognize both and reward the kids accordingly. If you are on a winning team, great, you get a trophy for the championship. If you aren't, then there's something to practice harder for-you don't really deserve a trophy. Although I have not experienced it first hand myself, I have heard many stories about one coach asking the opposing coach to keep a certain kid out because they are scoring too much-WHAT? Maybe they should tighten up their defense then. There are benefits and lessons to winning and losing. I feel that it is my job as a parent to instill dignity and grace into my children no matter what the situation.

After three baseball seasons, two soccer seasons, and one basketball season, my son's bureau top is now pretty cluttered with team participation trophies. I think it was a good thing from age 5 up to now, but like Beth I am also wondering when does this end? I hope it does soon, and when it does occur I hope the coach does a good job explaining at the beginning of the season why trophies were awarded before and what the kids would need to do to earn a trophy now.

this is bad for the future of the child, when they get into the real world suddenly they are not prepared correctly for disappointment and failure, participation trophies and games in which no official score is kept is the basis for the entire country falling behind the rest of the world. There is no accountability

After reading these comments, I understand why the kids today are so screwed up. You dont teach kids about athletics by giving them a trophies because they are able to put on a uniform. You teach kids by saying sorry your not good enough to make the team this year. If you practice hard you may get a spot next year. Where is the incentive to better yourself. You wonder why numbers are down in high school athletics? Because you actually have to be an athlete by that time. When the sport gets tough most kids drop out. Do yourself a favor mom and dad. If your kid stinks tell him. He'll be better for it.

I think this trophy business came along about the same time as the whole psyco babble about making kids feel good about themselves all the time. In the game of life there are winners and loosers. Kids are smart, they know when they are good at something. Sit them down and let them watch the Olympics or other sports events where they award first, second and third. It's the best way for them to understand the process. Let your kid discover what he/she is good at by playing sports with them. I know a young couple who have a two year old. Dad plays soccer in a league and Mom talks the little guy to watch. They have already discovered that this kid has a propensity for soccer. Spend the time watching and playing sports with your kids, and for the sake of your childs well being, stop agreeing to trophies for all.

I think trophies should not be given to all at any age just for participation. I also think at the very young ages (T-Ball through Coach Pitch) trophies should never be given out because scored shouldn't be kept. After coach pitch, the teams that win the championships should get the trophies. As someone posted above, the biggest things for kids to learn is how to work as a team, how to interact with others, how to compete and that we can get better at most things if we keep practicing and trying hard. As a person who hires for a larger company, I can see that a good percentage of college graduates have never dealt with failure. It happens in the real world. The earlier we learn to deal with and adapt to that failure the better we will be. The competetive drive of this country is at a low. Cheating and winning at all cost isn't the competetiveness I am talking about. I am talking about getting beat at anything and learning from it so we can better prevent it from happening again. What better way to learn that is there than sports? It isn't life and death and it is usually fun if done right.

I personally don't think trophies should be given either. I have an entire box in my basement as does my husband for competions in our youth that neither one of us remembers! My son also has a box full of medals, trophies and trinkets given him throughout the years, which were probably important to him then, but now, not so much. I just found a bunch at the bottom of his closet! I think if he won the big championship or really competed and had to truly earn them they would mean more. I am all for team sports and playing - I just think that should be the reward.

It is nice to see that a lot of people believe we should not be handing out trophies to everyone. We picked this up from school disricts, institutions that are suppose to be educating our kids and grandkids but persist in dealing with the "self-esteem" of said students. Some how this was translated to sports. I would suggest we keep this in mind. Thomas Edison had thousands of mistakes before he had his successful light bulb. Many successful individuals would tell us that their failures put them on the path to success. We need to take the same road for our kids whether it is sports or education.

I don't agree with giving trophies just for participation. I'm from Europe and I was very surprised to see the phenomena here where everybody is a winner, no feelings should be hurt and almost everybody makes the team. I was told at a young age about my weaknesses as a ball player, got cut from teams and spent lots of time on the bench. It just made me stronger and willing to work harder. I understand the developmental aspect of youth associations but it does not mean that each and everyone should be rewarded. It sends the wrong message. Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't. Sometimes you have success, sometimes you fail. That's a life lesson. I never lie to my kids about their athletic abilities or performance after a game, whether they were good or bad. They know it, don't always like it but it helped them keep a level headed attitude about sports. They know that, as good as they are in their little environment, hundreds of other kids are as good (or better) and only hard work and dedication will make the difference. No need for useless trophies.

Maybe I am alone in this belief, but I don't see the harm in giving a participation medal for kids at an early age (5-7), especially after their first year of a new sport. Sometimes kids struggle early with sports and I have seen parents pull them from teams halfway through the season for various non-academic reasons. I think it is important for a child to learn about committing to something and giving their word, and a participation medal at the end of the season rewards them for having made it through a season - after all, two months of T-ball to a 6 year old is significantly longer than two months to an adult. Once they are beyond that age, limit trophies to significant events. And note that I am talking about a medal (you can make it a ribbon, a paper certificate, etc) that recognizes the child for having completed the season, not a big trophy.

Judy
Trophies, ribbons, and medals are for winners. Handed out to one and all whatever the age, makes them worthless. Your child and every child knows their own abilities and the abilities of others on the team. They all know who is good and who stinks. Those who stink know they do not deserve their medal, trophy or ribbon. What you are suggesting is entitlement. I showed up for practice and the games. I spent most of my time on the bench because I stink at this sport. I still deserve and award. They know that if they want to excel they will need to practice and work hard at whatever sport they are interested in. If they do what they need to do all of us will benefit from their hard work.

There is now another problem that is a result of all of this. Many children, and their families/parents, now EXPECT for something to be awarded at the end of each season to each player, regardless of skill level. My response to the question to this same group of Mom's Talk members - how can that mindset be changed Who is willing to stand up to the families/players expecting a trinket (where 90% of them will be in a landfill in 10 years) that the gifts have been discontinued? Who is willing to now suffer the declining enrollment in our youth associations "because they don't give end of year awards to every player." Or is it just easier to raise the price of the registration fee by $10 to cover the costs so the psycho-babble of unfairness to all of our special children who deserve a trophy/medal at the end of the season becasue they participated and is a good kid and deserves more clutter that needs to be dusted off periodically and then winds up in the trash because they need space for more of the trinkets is not heard? That is the real question.

I've managed and worked with young men and women who have been part of the generation that was awarded a medal/ribbon/trophy/plaque/whatever for every aspect of competition. A lot of them have the attitude that they deserve a medal/ribbon/trophy/plaque simply for being on time and showing up for work. It creates an expectation sometimes, I think, that carries over into other aspects of life.

Kuddos to all the parents who think trophies for all are a bad idea. I hope some of you can stand behind your beliefs. It only takes one strong voice to bring awarness to an unpopular trend.

Judy
I hate to tell you this but more and more kids believe that the world owes them a living just because they exist. I blame parents and schools for this as well as awards for showing up of a sport..I watched this happen as a teacher and a coach. We need to stop the awards to those who are not deserving.

Judy I agree with your take on behavior. Good, bad or indifferent, it all starts in the home.

When my five year old son won his soccer participation trophtly, he decided he would try each sport so he could have a collection. He stopped after his first season of soccer, basketball, and football. Then we took him to a 5k race and we thought he would get a ribbon, and we would check another sport off his list. Instead, he found his sport. He is now thirteen years old, a member of his school track team, a recreational running club, and a dedicated 5k runner. He says this is a sport he can do his whole life, so he can stay healthy. Thanks to those trophies, he was willing to try a variety of sports until he found his passion.

OUCH Robin, Really not a fair comment about a child you don't know.

Robin, inappropriate comment! I hope we are all teaching our children ... 'If you don't have something nice to say, then don't say anything at all.'

Robin - that is a FANTASTIC comment!

Mom od DnNnDYou
Unless something changed over night I think your comment is out of line. Robin made a statement that others will agree with and some will disagree. As to kids and rewards going to all, that is not the thing to do under any circumstance. There are kids who will and do think that as long as they show up they will be rewared with something. That is not a good thing to do because kids believe they are entitled to something. While lots of parents are working hard to instill values in the kids there are those who don't and there will be repercusions for that.

Understand that I was critical of your remark because of the matter of free speech not the content. People will be people and will say stupid and inappropritate things. We don't imply that they should not have said something because that puts us on that slippery slope. We all need to be careful when it comes to speech particularly when it is written messages in forums like this or writing e-mails. Like others I would not be the person able to throw the first stone. What we are talking about here are kids being rewarded for everything they do and that needs to stop. That is why I referred to Remember the Titans. All of us should watch that movie at least once a year.

I have to say, it is very refreshing to hear all of these thoughts. My final question is-do people speak up when put in this situation-do you get involved to try to help change things? I hope so-I plan on it.

As a coach for youth sports over the years and a parent of four children I think the memories and the pizza or ice cream party at the end of the season is enough. Yes the hardware is nice but do the kids really care after the end of the season, the next year? Most don't care if they won or lost 5 minutes after the game ended at a young age. I think we has parents need to set expectaions for our youth that you do not get a reward for just showing up. You need to work hard give every effort and help your team at all times. You don't do this for a award, it's part of learning to be an adult. After seeing young adults who were given awards for showing up come into the business world with expectations of the same, we need to change something.

All of you who made these comments need to make an effort to go to your local youth organizations and make the case. Without doing so, the trophies and trinkets are going to be continually purchased. Merely typing your opinion and attaching your name is not enough. Reach out to the leaders of those leagues. Trinkets = money = savings.

I have both coached and officiated soccer from 8 year old to college for over 35 years.
I was pleasantly surprised to read the insightful comments regarding the awarding of "meaningless" participation trophies to their "young athletes" for just showing up to play the game. Today's parents must learn to "wake up and smell the coffee" and realize that there should be the "effort / reward" scenario regarding the awarding of any type of award!